... is not in a good place. I didn't write yesterday because I'm just not feeling it. All I want to do is eat oreo's, coca-cola and bread and take a nap. I don't want to be around people and deal with things. I want to be by myself with my child and loving on him. Lots of loving on him!
I've decided that being a stay-at-home mom means that I can dwell on things longer than I normally would. When my heart isn't in the right place, I can stew and think about all the issues all day long. There's nothing to distract me. When I was working, I could become so engrossed in my work that I could temporarily forget about my heart and focus on something else for awhile.
The problem with my heart being in a bad place is that it's affecting everyone and everything around me. It would be so nice if my bad heart would just sit itself in a corner until it was happy again. But it affects my marriage and my relationship with my child. And how is my child supposed to learn to have a happy heart if his momma doesn't??
So, pray for my heart. Pray that it moves itself into a good place.
What have you done to change your bad heart to a good heart???
Liz, did you post once about a mother's group you went to? MOPS, maybe? Maybe I'm imagining it...anyway...do you have a friend from that group or just someone you know that you know going through or that has been through this stage of life/mommyhood that you can talk to? You are not alone, Liz, in feeling selfish...wanting to just be a hermit...believe me, I've been there...Do you have a good Christian radio station to listen to? I know praise and worship music helps lift my spirit even when I don't "feel" like it. Praising God even when we don't feel like it is a choice...one you won't regret! He longs for you to come to Him and just sit...let Him love on you! Love you, Liz! : )
ReplyDeleteHi Karin!! You are totally correct! I do go to MOPS and actually have quite a few awesome friends from there. I ended up calling one of them last night who has been through the same issues I'm currently in, and she was a super help! Thank you for that idea! I also have been listening to some Christmas music and "yelling" at God. He's definitely working on molding me! I just wish I was more easily molded! Love you lady!!!
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